Open Letter: Grandparent Edition

I'm a big fan of letting people know that you care for them while they're still around. I even do it while sober, which can make others uncomfortable. I recently sat down and wrote separate, physical letters to my (married) grandmother and grandfather, because I wanted each to know how much I care about them individually, but I've chosen to combine the letter in my own record of it. (Just because you use the mail doesn't mean you have to completely trust that it will deliver your message. Record, copy, backup, save.)

I'm very lucky to still have my mother's parents in my life at this age and I realize it. I feel guilty for again moving out of state and away from them, but I know that they love me. I've decided to make more of an effort to let them know how much I appreciate them.

Let the people you care about know that they rock your world.



Dear Grandma and Grandpa B,

This letter and expression of thanks are long overdue and I apologize for not letting you know what you mean to me sooner. I treasure your presence in my life, and I am thankful, grateful and honored to call you my family.

Gramp, you taught me to protect and care for my mind, spirit and body. That what you put into them affects what they become. You have no idea how much your ever-present tales (the cookie thief, the tale of the oyster, the touch of the master's hand) have stuck with me and shaped the way I view the world. When I read "the funnies" in the newspaper or online, I can still hear you reading them aloud to me. Thank you for always being there, my own personal chicken soup for the soul.

Although my own dalliances with woodworking, music making and poetry displayed not even a minuscule level of talent, I have learned to appreciate all of them because of you. I will always appreciate a well-built fire and the people its warmth is shared with because of you. You have helped me see and appreciate beauty in so much of the world around me. Early mornings spent watching the steam rise from your coffee, while you talked about things I could not even begin to understand and the rest of the world was quiet and still were some of the most magic moments of my childhood. You are the sweetest, kindest, most gentle soul that I know.

Gram, you taught me that women can be independent, regardless of their marital status. You showed me how to not be afraid of doing or trying anything. You shared with me your love of reading, and although I pick up a romance novel far less frequently than I used to, they always remind me of you. You taught me to treasure traditions and customs and family. You taught me to appreciate the quality, and the amount of time, skill and love that go into hand made products. You inspire me to be a better artist in everything I create.

No matter what I've done in my life, you have been a constant source of encouragement, support and pride. You have never said anything to dash my hopes or dreams. I have never had any reason to doubt your level of love for me or pride in me. The events you've shown support for simply by being there mean the world to me. You not only went prom dress shopping with me, but you encouraged me to get the backless dress my mother never would have. You wanted to see when I got my first tattoo, you want to read every embarrassingly-drunk story I have written and you told me to "Just say it" when 19 year old me tried to clean up my language in front of you. Betty White's got nothing on you Gram.

I am eternally grateful for the constant support, the lessons you've shared, and the love you've given. You have been the best Grandparents a girl could ever hope for. Thank you. I love you and appreciate you. Though we may be far apart (my fault), you're never far from my thoughts.

xo,
(embarrassing childhood nickname)

I am a vast array of contradictions

I am easily amused. It doesn't take much to entertain me. I get excited by new shopping purchases. My most recent purchases (and thus my newest joy inducing toys):

Beefy new tires for my truck.

Cute little reindeer antlers for Lolo to wear when she sits on Santa's lap for her Christmas photo. (Shut it Barbie. Right now, before you even start)

Two new pairs of Adidas I got while Black Friday shopping with Lil Bro.

The awesome new recumbent exercise bike that is waiting to be assembled in my living room.

And the new makeup I ordered from Avon, upon finding the catalog on my mother's kitchen counter.

Which brings me to the real point of this post. I ordered two mascaras, one eye liner, and some mixed thing of eye shadow. I may not know much about makeup, but I do like to play. And part of that playing is my late night dressup/hairstyling/makeup experimentation. I believe Diablo Cody said it best (via Juno McGuff), "There's nothin' like experimentin,'" right kids?

This Avon order was delivered to me a few days ago, but because I was deathly ill all weekend, I have just now remembered it and decided to bring it out to play. I'll admit that Avon has a bit of a tough sell headed its way in convincing me to be a fan, since I'm completely in love with Urban Decay's mascara and eye liner, but I am completely willing to try new things. Once or twice.

I'll admit to having an oddly curious fascination with Avon, my grandmother sold it all of my life. The siblings and I were always so excited to go to Grandma B's and see what new things she had. So when I saw that Avon catalog sitting on my Mother's counter, I couldn't help but open it up to see what was inside. Being new to the world of makeup, I figured it would be almost irresponsible of me to pass up a sale and with it the cheapened opportunity to explore a new brand.

First on the play list was AVON's Daring Definition Mousse Mascara. Old school style brush/wand. Black color. Nothing remarkable. It didn't cause any clumping, but that may be because it's a new bottle. It reminded me a bit of Maybelline's Stiletto Mascara, if Stiletto didn't cause wicked clumping. Downside, it does absolutely nothing for curl. At least Stiletto gave my lashes a bit of a curl. I'm beginning to see the point of lash curlers.

Let's take a little detour for a moment here. Do you remember back in '03, when AVON started that marketing campaign where they tried to rename their makeup line Mark? In an effort to attract the under 60 crowd, they went on and on about how you needed to "Meet Mark," with all of their glamorous models walking around asking each other "Have you met Mark?" Cheesy as hell, but apparently it worked, since the Mark line is still around.

Next in the rotation was Feeling Fine Ultra Thin Eye Liner. I was pretty excited about this because I love eye liner. The right eye liner can work miracles. An ultra thin eye liner has potential. Off comes the cap, and I see that there is some sort of inner cap still stuck on. I put the cap back on and pull it off a few times, trying to dislodge it. No love. Since my grip is weaker than a limp fish's (Thank you Fibro), I bite the inner lid and try to pull it off. Then I realize that perhaps it's not meant to come off. Instead it twist it left and right until I see that it works like lipstick, except there seems to be no going back once you've gotten it out of the tube. Odd, but I'll go with it. Looking at the eye liner in disbelief I catch myself off guard when I say aloud, "You were in my mouth." And then I giggle, because Lolo has just looked at me as if I'm slightly dense. Undeterred, I start on my top right lid, and the tip breaks off. Now that I know how this little beast works, I twist it and return to my top right lid. Again the tip breaks off. Hmmmm. Apparently it's a bit of a science to get enough out to use without breaking off the tip. I twist just a tiny bit and decide to attempt the lower right lid instead. After stabbing myself in the eye twice, I manage manage to get the job done. I twist out a little more of the (stick/pencil/stuff) and go back to the upper lid. And the tip breaks off. Three Strikes and you're a failure.


Dear "Mark,"

What the hell man? How about some effing instructions?

You're done,
California Kay